Where Is My Mind
My laptop is broken. It’s so broken it hurts. Here is a list of things currently wrong with my laptop:
1) I frequently get complete system crashes complete with scary memory dumps and a bunch of crazy numbers on a blue screen.
2) When the system DOES crash, it refuses to boot, displaying “Error: Cannot find bootable hard drive” type messages that scare the hell out of me.
3) The only way to get the computer to start is to angle it very slightly to the left, and even then it only starts about 1 in 15 times.
4) The ethernet port no longer works.
5) The computer very rarely has audio.
6) The computer will frequently fail to recognize the presence of the AC adapter.
7) The computer is a piece of crap.
8. Once when I wasn’t looking the computer was convicted of raping a young women in a Los Angeles-Area night club and served seventeen months in an area prison.
9) The computer wears tennis shoes.
10) When I was a young man the computer frequently tried to get me into drugs and prostitution.
It’s becoming increasingly clear, then, that I need a new computer. I have a bevy of essays and assignments that need to be completed over the coming weeks, and I really can’t just wait around for this thing to stop functioning completely. With the way I leave things until the last minute, a complete system crash would leave me in a complete state of panic. I’d probably kick the wall for a while and then go to sleep. I’d be THAT distressed!
Here’s where things get weird, though: I’m thinking about getting a Mac.
Is that crazy? Is that wrong? I’ve decided that, if I’m going to get another laptop, I really want one that’s ultra portable and easy to travel with. My current Dell Inspiron weighs about 7 pounds and gets about 2 hours on a fully charged battery. That’s not what I want! I’m perfectly willing to sacrifice power for portability and battery life, and the iBook seems to be the best for that.
I don’t know, guys. The very fact that I’m considering this scares me. In less than a week or two, I may have a Mac. I’m not really sure I know who I am anymore. Tell me I’m not crazy.
Matt
Tags:apple blog broken nerd- Posted by Matt at 01:30 am
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umm, will you still be able to tell me all the things that are wrong with my computer if you have a mac? cause i would be really really lost if you couldnt tell me everything thats wrong with my computer. seriously. but if (as i assume would be the case) you would still be able to tell me everything i need to know then (to use a total miramichi-ism) drive er francis!
There are pros and cons, Matt. With a mac you don’t get viruses, and adware isn’t an issue, and it crashes about once a year, but when it does it crashes hard. It’s great for people like me who need a computer that works consistently, where the little magic elves inside don’t get tired. With you, who actually deals with the elves, you may want to go Dell
You’re not crazy. This is probably the best idea you’ve ever had. And why iBook instead of PowerBook? Are you intimidated?
‘Cause it is a lot of power.
And Tiger is coming out next spring!
Macs have a certain “artsy” factor that you could exploit for some villainous end. I don’t know what that is yet, but you are just creative enough to find it. Perhaps some sort of subversion to the accepted soscial norm. Who knows?
If your computer was Kobe Bryant, it wouldn’t have had to worry about the jail time.
Wait, what was the question.
Yeah, my only real concern with going Mac is software. Though as far as my typical piracy goes (BitTorrent and Direct Connect) I seem to be more than covered. And VLC (the media player I use on the PC) is apparently even better on the Mac, so that’s a plus too. I don’t use Internet Explorer or Outlook Express anymore — I have to struggle to come up with a piece of software that I won’t be able to have were I to get a Mac. I dunno — Do Macs Run Civilization 2? I kind of like that game.
The only reason I wouldn’t go Dell again, honestly, is because I think Dell laptops are best used when they remain stationary 90% of the time. If you just want something that’ll stay on your desk most of the time, then Dell makes a good laptop. My Inspiron was a nice machine and it’s lasted almost 4 years without major incident (until now) but I always felt a bit chained to the desk with it. It didn’t travel too well — the case feels flimsy, the laptop is too heavy and the battery life sucks.
As far as iBook vs. Powerbook goes, I think I’d go Powerbook if I was looking for something that’d be my primary and only computer for the next bunch of years. The long-term goal is to have a small portable laptop and a nice PC (with a ton of storage and a DVD burner, naturally), however, and I think the iBook offers more in the way of portability than the Powerbook.
Plus the 12″ iBook is nearly a thousand dollars cheaper, which is a huge plus.
I dunno, I’m still iffy. I don’t want to become one of those MAC GUYS who is always like “GET A MAC, BOZO!” to everyone on the street, so I’m worried about that. But I was playing with OS X and Expose and all that cool stuff the other day and I was like, “Hey, I could use this.”
I’m in the library right now because my computer is completely dead at the moment. If I don’t get something soon I will explode.
you still havent addressed my concern. will you still be able to pwn my computer troubles if you have a mac?
mac’s are ultra cool. And thanks for bringing back the word “bevy” from vocab obscurity.
I’m not a big fan of macs, or computers in general. But I have a weird relationship with computers: I hate them, but I use them so much; they aggravate me when they work but not quite right, but they send me into a RAGE when they don’t work at all.
I see you’re in the latter situation, Matt. At this rate it’s better to have a mac than nothing at all! Plus it’s cheap, like you said. So save yourself from the rage and get yourself a cheap-ass iBook now! Now now now now now! It’s OK, I’ll try not to wretch when I’m in its presence — and you can show me how to use one when I come by!
What it comes down to — and what I think would make you most happy — is something that just plain works. Something that just “no worries” works. The iBook can provide you with that peace of mind. I can see you being satisfied with its performance.
And don’t worry, J-dub! If Matt won’t help you with your PC woes, I can always try.
Okay, so the laptop situation has slightly improved. I took out the laptop hard drive and blew on it and lightly tapped it against the table a few times and then put it back in and now the computer will start again. However, the ethernet port still doesn’t work! And I bet this thing will crash again any second now.
And of course I’d be able to help you, JWB. Even if I don’t HAVE a PC for a while, I’ll still use them all the time and stuff! Pearle could always help, too, of course. She works for ebay and helps people all day and just LOVES IT!
Also: Bryan’s SISTER! How great is THAT. Come to Halifax, soon!
dude, i only just now got the computer wears tennis shoes reference. man, what a movie.