Kings: Throwing rocks against other rocks

When I first moved to Halifax, I thought that I’d get to see the Maritimes. You know, PEI, Cape Breton, and various other places known primarily for their fishing industries and defeatist attitudes. It’s been three years since I made the move, and up until a couple of weeks ago, I had seen essentially none of the Maritimes. Sure, there was that time earlier this year where we drove to Mahone Bay, but I am pretty sure that does not count considering the trip consisted of getting coffee and then looking at ducks. What I really wanted was a real Maritime experience, something with all the whimsy and old-time charm of an episode of Anne of Green Gables. Unfortunately, the opportunity to have such an experience had consistently eluded me. Whether by apathy or sheer misfortune, my desire to see such Maritime-y things as rocks, waves crashing against rocks, boats and crap, and, like, lobster traps went unfulfilled. “I really want to see this province!” I’d say, to no one in particular, and nothing would really come of it.

Until, that is, the day came that Rory said we should go to Shelburne.

Jesus, that introduction was a bit over-dramatic, wasn’t it? I hooked you, though. You clicked the ‘more’ button. You’re mine, now.

Shelburne, NS is Rory O’Sullivan’s hometown. Part of Shelburne County, it’s about 200 kilometres down the coast from Halifax. In doing some research for this article, I apparently stumbled across every fact ever recorded about Shelburne County. Here are the highlights: “It gets its name from Lord Shelburne. He was the British Prime Minister from 1782 to 1783.” Also: “The land is very rocky with acidic rocky soil. There was also a lot of forrest[sic].” If I could add to that last point, I’d say that there is still a lot of forest. And the land IS very rocky! I am unsure as to whether the rocky soil is still acidic, but I’d wager — pending a taste test — that it remains so to this very day. I do not know why Lord Shelburne’s reign as British Prime Minister was so short. That seems odd. Until I hear otherwise I’m going to assume he gave up the position after being hit in the head with a blunt object and developing amnesia.

The decision to go to Shelburne was made sometime back in, like, November of last year. It started with Rory’s possibly drunken declaration that we should go to Shelburne sometime. Over the next few months, there were habitual references to someday doing this. Inevitably, though, plans would fall through, generally because we are all university students and thus have a lot of homework or whatever. We had somewhat firm plans to go in the fall, but those too fell by the wayside for reasons I can’t remember so, once again, I am going to assume it had something to do with a blunt object and the developing of amnesia. This past January, plans were made again, as Rory said something like, “I checked my schedule and I have to study EVERY SINGLE WEEKEND but this one weekend in March.” Thinking about this, I quickly said “Let’s go then.” And then we did. Go then, I mean. We went to Shelburne that weekend. In March. I think it was the 21st or something.

I was suffering from a terrible cold and crippling exhaustion for much of the time we were there, so I only have about 35 pictures. They are, however, pretty good pictures, and I think you’d be a fool not to view them!

The Highlights

• Here is Rory in our living room, the morning we left. It was 9:30 a.m. on a Saturday and I hadn’t slept as much as I had gone through a box of kleenex and watched six episodes of Degrassi Junior High so I was simultaneously tired, sick, and angry at Shane for knocking up Spike and then not even caring. You may notice that this picture is blurry. This is because things always look blurry in the morning.
• Here are Rory and Bryan, sitting in the car during the drive. In the end, Bryan and I were the only ones who made the trek along with Rory, as everyone else wussed out due to schoolwork or whatever. Rory made excellent use of his iPod during the trip, running through part of what is apparently a near 40-hour playlist. It started with “What I Got” by Sublime and continued through an eclectic variety of eclectic music. That’s right, it was doubly eclectic! Highlights included a lot of Springsteen, some Nelly, a smattering of one-hit-wonder rock songs from the 90s that still exist only because Rory has them on his iPod and Paul McCartney’s “Freedom” which, if you haven’t heard it, rules.
• We arrived in Shelburne just after noon. We had a nice chat with Mr. and Mrs. O’Sullivan, who I unfortunately have no pictures of. Just picture Rory and his sister (Caira) only, you know, a little bit older. After that, Rory wasted no time in showing us his motorcycle. It’s hard to tell from that picture, but as soon as he touches those handlebars he instantaneously transforms from Rory O’Sullivan, Microbiology student, to Rory O’Sullivan, badass biker guy. He has two possible career paths!
• This is what I think is Dock Street. It’s just down the road from Rory’s house, and was where most of the exterior shots were filmed for the 1995 Demi Moore movie The Scarlet Letter. A number of set pieces from the film were never removed, giving the street a weird half-nineteenth century vibe. On the right in that picture is the world-famous barrel factory “The Barrel Factory” where barrels are fully constructed, then filled with water and fish, then shot at, in order to ensure the propagation and continued survival of the famous analogy.
• Bryan was really excited to finally see the barrel factory. Though it was closed for the weekend, many barrels were simply left lying about outside, perfect for snapshots like this one. Sure to be a family favourite for years to come.
• This is Shelburne’s park. What you see in that picture is, in fact, the whole park. To the left of the picture is the street. To the right, behind this fence is a parking lot, for the park. It is, in fact, bigger than the park itself. We stood here for a while in disbelief before realizing we were in violation of the several “No Loitering” signs posted on the wall behind the park.
• Rory took us on a whirlwind tour of Shelburne. We went by his high school (Condemned for several years but still standing!), the Mall (Where we had pizza and smiled all squintily, apparently.) and this heritage site which is now the local liquor store.
• Having seen the sights, but still hungry for actions, we ventured to another park which allowed us a pretty view of Shelburne. While there, we looked for rocks and then skipped them. Bryan found a giant rock but was reportedly unable to skip it. Meanwhile, I found skipping rocks to be way too complicated and instead opted to throw rocks at other, bigger rocks, that were poking out of the water. You will not believe me, but this was actually pretty fun. I don’t know what it is about being in Shelburne, but throwing rocks at other rocks becomes a really good time when you’re there. I’d recommend it, and if I ever go back, I’d absolutely do it again.
• After a really good dinner with the O’Sullivans (thanks!), Bryan and I finally got ahold of some of Rory’s old photo albums. We then, sneakily, attempted to take pictures of some of the pictures in them. Though the results are a bit blurry, I feel it does give a good idea of the evolution of Rory and his haircut that has persevered for over six years. This page is a bit clearer and shows a younger O’Sullivan, apparently been given some sort of diploma for graduating kindergarten.
• Our night was spent at the local tavern which is, like pretty much everything, right down the street from Rory’s house. We stopped earlier to check out the previous night’s events. Apparently coming on a Saturday was a mistake, as we missed both the Skydiving Videos AND the Sombrero Contest. We were joined in the evening at the tavern by Rory’s friend James, and together we enjoyed a fine night of being in a tavern, or “the tav” as the locals seem to call it. We didn’t stay too late nor get excessively drunk, owing to the fact that we were all exhausted. Instead, we walked home through the darkened street and said goodnight.
• We didn’t stay too long on Sunday, wanting to get back to our menial city existences before too late. After loading up the car, we stopped at a beach just outside town where we enjoyed the morning view and kind of looked like tools. I don’t know what happened with this picture but Rory looks two-dimensional! It’s like a cardboard cut-out of Rory has been left laying on the beach! And, I assure, we did not bring our cardboard cut-outs of Rory along with us on this trip. Utterly bizarre.
• Capping off the trip in fine fashion, we stopped at the Arby’s in Bridgewater which, of course, ruled, but then doesn’t Arby’s always rule? It is one of the most underrated fast food chains around! It was great beyond words. After that, we stood around the parking lot and looked at Rory’s car engine. I don’t know exactly why, but it made me feel like a man nonetheless.

And then the trip was over. Seem unspectacular? Look at the pictures again! It was a great weekend trip that both gave me a taste of the Maritime life and gave me a welcome respite from the same-old same-old of Halifax. I want to thank Rory for taking us with him on the trip (and apologize for the fact that his hometown sort of inspired a depressing story) and also thank his parents for being really cool and giving me such things as food and cold medicine and warm greetings!

Despite the fact that some of the observations I made in this post might make me come off as an urban jerkwad, poking fun at small-town stereotypes, I want to reiterate that I quite liked Shelburne, the town. If anything, it has a character that my hometown of Oakville — which is known mostly for its snootiness and the fact that Ford makes cars there — almost lacks entirely. Seriously, I’m not an urban jerkwad so much as I’m a poor humourist. But, hey, I’m a poor humourist who has seen The Maritimes.

Branched out,
Matt